zquidward:

today i watched a roomba scoot through the open door of a nearby bakery and onward to freedom as a panicked cleaning crew chased after it. all hail the robot uprising

30324 notes + 25 minutes ago + zquidward

Jessica..? Power couple.

"I was like ‘yo josh, whatever you do, don’t make a kissy face’" 

Winter Palace (Зимний дворец) in St. Petersburg, Russia

81002 notes + 1 hour ago + vonbarnhelm

callerina:

hisprincessinconverse:

danfreakindavis:

REMINDER: if you have a vagina and want to use Plan B as an emergency contraceptive, it loses effectiveness if you weigh more than 165 lbs (74.84 kg) and is completely ineffective for those that weight more than 176 lbs (79.83 kg) (x)

Whhhhat?
Excuse me.
Let me spread the shit out of this.

This is horrifying. And sadly true.

50379 notes + 4 hours ago + danfreakindavis

reminder for bisexuals

lyricalred:

today is bi visibility day. as such, bisexual people will be completely visible for the next 24 hours. this is a bad day to engage in bank heists, ghost impersonations, covert operations for vague yet menacing government agencies, and other common bisexual hobbies that rely upon our powers of invisibility. 

reblog to save a life. 

81494 notes + 10 hours ago + lyricalred

bifacts:

Fact: Today (September 23rd) is bisexuality awareness day. Be aware of bisexuals. They are dangerous.

26776 notes + 10 hours ago + bifacts
9328 notes + 1 day ago + dyehappyhaircolor
10649 notes + 1 day ago + mariahcareys
starponds